Today I woke up and felt ok which was a bit nice because during the last days I had been feeling quite depressed and sad for many reasons but well I knew it wouldn't last that long especially because today it's Friday so most people go out, in this case I'm talking about my "friends" and my brother. Everything was nice until my brother told me that on Wednesday he saw a close friend of mine (Who also dressed up as a Wisemen, the one in the middle) at a pub where he always goes with his cousins (He only goes out with his cousins because only they have the same education that he has, as he told me once) so I told my brother that it makes me sick the fact that my friend only goes out with his cousins and I told him "I'm not like that .." (I didn't finish what I was going to say because it would be too weird for my brother) and he replied "Yeah you prefer to listen to S Club" (Making fun of my personality) and well it wasn't from hin but anyway in the evening I was online and my friend signed in and as usually he asked me "Are you going out today" and I replied "No" so he said something like "Just make sure that you don't commit suicide while your at home" trying to joke in a mean way because he knows that I'm not a party animal like my brother and I think this really made me feel sad because during the last weeks I had started to appreciate our "friendship" despite the fact that he's constanly talking bad about me becauuse "I'm too thin" "I don't read books besides the school ones" and stuff like that but todayhe really made me feel angry and sad and I thought about replying to him in a rude way but I didn't especially because Christmas is almost here. After a few seconds he told me that he was leaving and all I said said was "Have a nice Christmas, have fun". Maybe I should've replied to him in a mean way or maybe not but these kinda things always make me feel bad about my personality, I mean I am the way I am and I like it but sometimes it's also hard to be crtizised by your family and those who call themselves your friends.
I know this situation has made appreciate a lot of things in life that people don't usually apprecite because they never take the required time to think about them and it's nice because you get to develop your personality but at the same time it is a bit difficult from time to time because whenever I decide to shre my thoughts with my sister she thinks I'm crazy and at a certain point I understand her because as I said before not all people are able to see "invisible" things like a true happy moment or something like that.
Someone famous I can really relate to, Will Young who in a certain way also suffered, when at a young age when he became famous he accepted his homosexuality, because of his "different" personality. I love this pic, it's perfect in every way for me.
Labels: About Me