Good times

As most of you might know by now my life has been experiencing some small changes that have made me shift in a good way, right now I think that besides making a dream come true by meeting VB and seeing the Spice Girls live the fact that I have met another gay guy who seems to like me (as a friend) has made me see life from a different point of view; I mean it's not as if my whole world had changed but at least now I feel more comfortable 'cos I have experienced a world in which I'm allowed to be myself without being criticized and well the funny thing about this is that because of the way I had lived until I met Gil (my gay friend) sometimes I'm "ashamed" of doing certain things I feel like doing when I'm with him 'cos I have that social mark that makes me think I'm being girly or gay, however I'm working on that because I think it's time for me to start living my life lol I know his might sound a bit "optimist" but I really think a good change is coming and I love that feeling, in fact I think it's something I took for granted since when I reflected about my grand mother's death a couple f days ago... so let's just wait and see what happens!

A great escape for me whenever I feel a bit outta place or uncomfortable while I'm at Uni orwith my mates has been my iPod.. yeah I sing along and dance around while I listen to some of my favourite tunes, I must admit it's a great medicine.

I love her !

Natasha Bedingfield is one of my favourite artists, I first discovered her back in 2005 when she was promoting her first album in Europe (Yeah .. I always get into other countries' music ha). When I first saw her video for "These Words" (whic later trned into a smash hit all over the world) I thought the concept was really original and fresh as well as the song, as I carried on discovering the rest of her singles until that stage ("Single" and "Unwritten") I fell i love with her especially 'cos of her amazing lyrics, when I realised the album was being sold over here in Mexico I immediately bought it and I enjoyed ever song on it.

When I read about her plans to make it in the US I thought she'd be a huge flop 'cos well US people are not into that kinda music however she really amazed me because her debut single "Unwritten" (alongside with a new video) achieved a lot of fame in the US so as a consequence her debut album was big in te US as well, I fetl really happy and proud of her because I know she deserves that and more since she's a true artist.

Last year she released her second album in Europe, N.B., and to be honest I expected more from it however I liked it and felt happy when her first single from N.B., "I Wanna Have Your Babies", charted at number 7 in the UK however I was sure that if she released that song in the US she'd flop for real bt again.. the clever lady knew she had to work on something stronger in order to carry on with her success in the US so not so long ago she released her second album in the US; Pocketful Of Sunshine, which is almost as perfect as her first album. I can say I love every song on that album however there's one that I could say is the best one and it's called "Freckles" I can say I feel really identified with that song because of the lyrics, I never thought I was an ugly guy or anything like that but anlazying the song from a deeper side I was really excited when I listened to the chorus because it's really true and special. All can say right now is that she's a great musician and well I jus love this song, wheever I listen it I feel chills down my spine 'cos it really motivates me... here are the lyrics:

hum, hum, hum...hum, hum
i used to care so much about what others think about
i almost didn't have a thought of my own
the slightest remark would make me embark of the journey of self - doubt
but that was a while ago
this girl has got stronger
and if i knew then what i know now i would've told myself don't worry any longer
it's ok...

cuz a face without freckles is like a sky without the stars
why waste a second, not loving who you are
those little imperfections make you beautiful, loveable, valuable
they show your personality...inside your heart

reflecting who you are
(who you are, who you are, who you are) whoa ooh whoa ooh whoa
yea, yea, uh

i wondered if i could trade my body with somebody else in magazine
Would the whole world fall at my feet
I fell down, worthy
& would blame my failures on the ugliness I could see
when the mirror looked at me
(some times I feel)
Sometimes i still feel like the little girl who doesnt belong in her own world
but im getting better at reminding myself...

Chicago !!

I so wanted to post my pics/review aout my trip to Chicago a couple of days ago bt I hadn't had time because of my hectic week at school and the detah of my grand mother however right now I have time to do it... :D

I must say it was the best trip I've ever made lol and this time I had no problems with the US officers at the airport, I loved everything besides the fact that I was fooled by a man who took me from the airport to my hotel and asked me to pay him 168 dlls. (the regular fare is 40 dlls.!!) didn't complain about it 'cos he seemed to be a "rude" man so I didn't want to get in troubles. Anyway besides that incident my trip was perfect, I loved every moment; going to the supermarket on my own, walking to the stores/malls to do some shopping, meeting new people like the couple tha were next to me in the concert or the ladies who were staying in my hotel and who were also going to see the Spice Girls live, I even met an online friend from the US and I also saw a friend from Russia (I regret about not metting him.. but I could lose my place in the queue to meet Victoria Beckham!). Everything was perfect, I even had the chance of meeting Victoria Beckham and even though I wasn't able to have a pic with her 'cos the cameras andthe flashes made her feel nervous she gve me her autograph and told me I've got nice teeth which is really flattering.

The concert was amazing as well, I was on my feet the whole way through and I screamed like a crazy man, lol my lungs and my throat still hurt haha but I dont' care, I danced like I had never daned before an even though I was on my own I had an amazing time, I sang every song and wlel I jumped like a little kid haha I can say it's one of the best moments in my life.

Chicago River..frozen

The Spice Girls singing "Mama" with their kids on stage and their mummies on the screens.

Outside of a Presbyterian Church that was next to my hotel.

LOL I couldn't help smiling haha.

The Magnificent Mile illuminated.

The end ofthe concert after 2 hours 20 min aprox.

After performing as a 4 piece band Geri returns to the stage with them :D

LOL I was really excited after I met Victoria, I had to take a picture of me holding her autograph.

Upside Down..

First of all I wanna say sorry for this belated post but it's just that well even though one week ago I was the happiest guy on earth because I saw the Spice Girls live in Chicago and I met Victoria Beckham last Thursday my dad's mum died so we've been really down and well that kept me busy because we had to go to her burrial and all that stuff. I must admit it has been shocking for me 'cos it the first time that I lose a family member since I turned into a mature guy so yeah I have been feeling sad and of course I couldn't help crying for her, I can tell you it's a nice feeling knowing that you have a strong family and well of course knowing that even though my grand mother is dead now she left loads of things in me like her advices and comments that were always correct, it's a nice feeling for me and to be honest this kinda changed my life because it has made me realise that well all of us will die one day so it's not good to live my life that stressed or sad because well I'm just 19 years old and she was 92... I still have plenty of time to experience and discover different things, I'm not saying I'm going to turn into a wild guy... no, I'm just gonna strart to change some aspects of my life that could help me to be more happy and enthusiastic about life.

My brother phoned me the next morning afer my grand mother died (Friday) and even though I was sleeping I cried and felt a bit guilty because while she was dying I was partying with my friends.. I had no news about her so I wasn't worried, in fact I was really happy 'cos I was hanging out with my gay friend and my "normal" friends so I had a really nice time lol I really wanted to kiss him again but of course I couldn't do it 'cos the rest of my friends were there however we did have a nice time just for the two of us and w whispered to eachother's ears 'cos the music volume was too loud, sometimes I really think I would liek to have a relationship with him but I don't take it too seriously 'cos he hasn't shown interest in a relationship.. maybe it's too soon.. mabe it wn't happen? wo knows!

Here's a picture of us, my gay friend is the second one from right to left, lol you can see I had beard but it's only 'cos it was a busy week at school so I thought it'd be better to avoid shaving while I took a shower so that I could sleep more haha.

Some updates

- My grandmother's got lung cancer and well the doctors say she'll live for no more than 2 weeks so things are a bit tense with my parents right now, yesterday we spent most of the day at her house and she seemed to be really down, when she went to bed she coudln't stop saying she's affraid that somehitng bad could happen to her, so my dad stayed with her for a long time until she felt asleep and well my dad, as my mum told me, was crying. She's 92 years old and thinking about her death makes me feel sad even though I undersatnd the fact that she's an old person and it's "normal" 'cos that's the way life goes, however this situation has made me reflect a lot about my life and the way I've lived it until now... I know I have to be less strict with myself 'cos well I'm alomst a baby compared to my grandmother and it's a bit silly for me to live life with all my "rules" 'cos when I get older I'll regret about being so strict when I was younger. I have also reflected about other things but this is probably the most important or me right now.

In this pic you can see my grandmother with her brother, some of my aunts, the husband of one of them and my dad on the upper left corner.

- I'm really really excited about my trip to Chicago next Thursday... and to make it even better a couple of days ago I read on the official Spice Girls web that Victoria will be signing some autographs at Saks 5th Avenue in Chicago on the 15th (the day of the concert) so if I'm lucky enough I might get the chance of having a picture taken with her which makes me feel even more excited!

Posh Spice looking stunning as usually.

- Right now I just can't get out of my head (LOL) the new Kylie's single, in US and UK, which is "WOW". I listen to it everyday lol even before I fall alseep I listen to it on my iPod, it's just an amazing song and it puts me in agood mood. Atomic Kitten have also been inside my head lately so I've been projecting myself with some of their hits singles like "If You Come To Me", "Ladies Night", "Be With You", "The Tide Is High (Get The Feeling)" and of course the latest one "Anyone Who Had A Heart".

You can see the videoclip for Kylie's sigle here:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=LnTrZYHK_II

Pop beauties Atomic Kitten performing "Be With You" live at their Greatest Hits Tour back in 2004.

- I'm also feelig happy 'cos even though I didn't hang out with Gil (the gay friend I met last week) this week we were able to have a niceMSN chat and he said we could go out for a coffee next week before I go tot Chicago so I'm looking forward to that as well.


- Last but not least last Thursday I went out with some friends who study Architecture as well and I must admit I had a really nice laugh, I felt really happy with them and this is something nice for me because I'm feeling that the little changes and reflections I've made in my life recently have helped me to develop myslef a bit more, I did have a rough time when everybody started to talk about the guys they suspect are gay in our generation and well also 'cos of their silly comments but I tried not to pay attention to that.

Hmm...

Today I didn't have classes however I've just returned to my "home" here in Mexico city 'cos no-one was able to bring me here tomorrow morning but anyway I was having dinner with 2 housemates, one of them has just arrived and the other one is the one who likes S Club lol, and well we were kinda introducing ourselves to the new guy and my housemate didn't stop laughing/joking about the fact that I still miss my family from time to time just because we're a stable family in all the sense of the word, his parents are divorced and he can't stand them so he laughs at me 'cos I see my family every weekend but it's not my problem the fact that he doesn't miss his family 'cos they have probelms..

At first I found this a bit sad because I was just like "Oh God maybe he's right I'm a loser " but when I thought it over I realised there's nothing wrong with it, I mean it's my family after all and it's like my root, of course as time passes by things between my family and I will change because I need to grow up but maybe right now I just love them so much because of all the things I've gone through and all the efforts I know my parents make so that I can be the person I am so now I know I should've told this guy "You know what it's not your business if I see my family every weekend, if your life is different I don't care" or something like that so that he realizes he's no one to laugh at me, I have always known this but I used to think it would be rude to act in a rude way in those situations but after all I have to earn my respect and this guy has been joking around with me for a while now so I won´t allow that to happen anymore, I'm glad I can see things this way now because it's part of growing up as a person.

The time is coming..

I can't believe next week I'll see the Spice Girls live lol I remember thinking about it some weeks ago and that date seemed to be far but now that I think about it it's next week lol I'm gonna sound like an idiot but I still can't believe I'm gonna see them, it's just as if time had flown away.

I'm very excitied about this because it will be my first proper concert ever and well.. it's not gonna be an average one, I had been to a concert once in my life before, I went to the concert of a mexican artist called Belinda like 4 years ago but only 'cos my friends wanted us to go however I can't wait to see the Spice Girls live.. it's like a dream come true for me.

Even though now I'm going on my own because the frind I was going with has an exam on that date I think my excitement will be worth all the nerves of traveling on my own and being on my own in the U.S. as long as I don't have the same bad expereince I had last year when I wnet to Houston Txs.

Surprise !

Today (after I came back to earth because of what happened last night) I was going to meet a couple of friends in this popular american restaurant called "T.G.I. Friday's" and well this time I didn't feel "anti-social" at all because yeah meeting this gay guy yestrday made me feel really happy so I thought I'd go with them wihtout feeling down or out of place; however when I returned to my hometown, after my classes were over, another friend who studes with my sister invited me to celebrate the birthday of a friend of them in the same restaurant so I really didn't feel like going 'cos I was already going to be there with other firends at night so it'd have meant that I'd have spent lunch time and dinner time there however she convinced me of going 'cos we agreed we'd see echother more often a couple of months ago when we randomly saw echother at a mall.

Earlier this week I talked with my sister on MSN and she told me that her best friend missed me and all of my positive/funny comments so I told her it'd be nice if se invited her to our home on Friday so that we could catch up however even though she didn't invite her to our home 'cos of the restaurant plans they already had I saw her 'cos in the end I was also invited but what I liked about this is that well she really wanted to see me because when my sister and I entered to the restaurant she stood up of her chair and ran to me while she smiled and when we said "Hello" we hugged, I found this really really nice because well when I was in High School we used to have a lot of fun but I never thought she'd still care of me in terms of friendship because I had already started Uni but to my surprise she really missed me and I liked it 'cos I think it's nice when people show you they like you for who you are.

However things weren't THAT good as time passed away because well I saw other girl friends who study with my sister as well, but they really hate my sister and her best friend because they are more mature and also 'cos my sister and her friend are slim whereas they're a bit fat so well it's a long but quite common teenager's story however they adore me but today things changed between us because at a certain point they started to blow little pieces of napkins with straws which is something a bit disgusting 'cos they put them inside their mouths before blowing them so well my sister and her friend didn't like it but they never said somethig rude about it but when these girls found it out they started to laugh at my sister and her frend 'cos they considered them too "posh" and well it wasn't only that, they also started to say bad words to them (they didn't notice it but I did 'cos I was beside them) and well I felt really angry so I didn't talk to them anymore and when they asked me why was I mad ta them I told them "Because you were really rude with my sister nd her firend" and they said soemthng like "We didn't come here to fight" so didn't say anything else.

I must admit it was a bit sad but well I wasn't shocked because my sister had already told me about the rude things they to do her and her friend while they're at school.

This is a pic of my sister, her bets friend and me at the restaurant.

Oh what a night!

LOL I'm a bit speechless about what happened to me last night, honestly, I could say it was one of the best nights I have ever had.

The thing is that, as I posted it some weeks ago, I went out with gay guy who's friend of a friend of mine and wow I just can't stop smiling everytime I think about it. He's good looking, he's a bit tall, he's got really nice eyes haha and well yeah he's got a nice personality. When he picked me up he was acting a bit girly and I felt a bit shocked but as we felt more comfortable I made a comment about his personality and he was just like "I've got loads of them lol u'll get to know them with time" and yeah I noticed he's not only "girly" as the night carried us away, we went to a very famous gay avenue here in Mexico city called "Zona Rosa" (Pink Zone). First we went to a coffee and we had a nice chat there, he told me about his gay life about the bf's he's had and well yeah I aslo talked about my gay life and stuff like that, I must admit I felt like a naive guy 'cos it wasn't only the fact that I was with a nice gay guy, it was also the fact that for the first time I visited a gay place and obviously there were loads of gay couples there and they were kisisng lol so I told him "You know what, it's the first time I see that" -referring to a gay kiss- and he was just like "Oh really?" and I said "Yes" so he aproached to me and said "Do it" ... gosh I felt really shocked and nervous and at first I thought about saying "No" 'cos well it was the 2nd time we hanged out bu I thought it over and said to myeslf "You don't have to pretend, it's not somehting rude just do it jackass" so I did it and wow I must say I enjoyed it it felt really nice hha I tried to do my best however my friend told me he prefers kisses that start little by little so we did it again :D well it wasn't like an ever lasting kiss but it was nice.

After that we went to a gay club and again I saw loads of gay couples, I got a nice feeling ad I felt good; I mea for the first time I was able t be myself without feeling worried or pressured well I did feel abit of pressure when I met other friends of my friend 'cos they were all like a bit shocked (I guess in a bad way) when they knew it was my first "gay" night ever but well I was already prepared for that so I didn't let it spoil the moment. We carried on chatting and well did hae a nce time however I know i'tll take me some time to get into the whole gay world just like my friend told me but I don't mind that 'cos it's better than changing my personality just to fit in quicker.

One thing I must say is that I really felt comfortable wth him, I mean yeah maybe it'd be obvious since it was my first gay night eer but it's not only that, I really liked his personality as well as his ideas about sex, he's careful about it, and well I kno it was my first time but I liked kissing him, lol after he left me at home I cuoldn't stop thining about it and "feeling" his lips however I don't really knnow what's in the future for us but as long as we carry on being friends I'm happy, he's the kinda guy I was expecting to meet and well it's happened now maybe in the future we'll have a relationship but I dunno (He said he only kisses good looking guys after he kissed me XD) and I prefer not to think about it, I'll let if flow the way it comes.

So well thb I never thought I'd see this day so soon so I feel really happy, I know he understood my anxiety/excitement so I'm ok with that because it has allowed me to see life in a different perspective 'cos at leats now I know I have a good friend (if nothign chnages) and well he's brought something I was missing in my life.

LOL there's no need to explain why did I post this pic.